Ten Things I Hate About The Holidays

10. The commercials start in August
9. Mistletoe anxiety
8. The clanging bells outside every store
7. Rudolph. He knows what he did on my roof
6. Geese a layin’ ain’t as sexy as it sounds
5. If the glove don’t fit, you must stand in line for an hour and a half to return it
4. Billions of dollars in no bid contracts. Oh wait, that’s things I hate about Halliburton
3. Finding out how Santa becomes jolly.
2. All the fruitcakes
1. Too much egg not enough nog
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