Attention Getter

A guy is telling me all his important shit and, in the middle, farted. It smelled like a rabid raccoon.

And he just kept talking.

I couldn’t accept the concept that 1) he didn’t excuse himself 2) after fifteen seconds my eyes were still watering.

“Dude,” I said. “I was giving you my full attention you didn’t have to send me an ass gram.”

Would you believe it? He took umbrage.

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5 responses to “Attention Getter

  1. you shoulda asked him if he drew mud.

    “for crying out loud, do ya need to wipe?!!”

  2. What’s a rabid raccoon smell like?

  3. Ya ever been to a portapotty at a meat lovers convention?

  4. My dead ex-mother-in-law’s breath; she drank beer all night, coffee all day and smoked day and night, never actually brushed her teeth, just took them out every now and then to rinse them off under the kitchen tap. Now that’s a rabid racoon!

  5. Guy telling you all his important shit: $100

    Guy sending you an ass-gram: Priceless.

    Just how important was all his shit?

    Important enough to fart about.

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