We’re sitting at this seaside bar watching the ships and boats and dogs on jet skis go by. Suddenly, unexpectedly, unwantedly, a guy decides to share his good news with us.
“Hey, I gotta tell ya something.”
Why? That’s always a question when some stranger, especially someone we’ve had no contact with, decides to tell us something.
We look at him as he sideways smiles at us. His lady friend slowly spins her chair, I’d have to assume, to gauge our reaction to this something he has to tell us.
“I proposed to my girlfriend last night.”
‘Good on ya, mate!” I say with as much enthusiasm I can muster. To say the enthusiasm was between getting information about someone’s new office chair and their toe nail collection would be pretty precise.
It’s not to say I’m not happy for them it’s just that I know he’s going to have to keep talking. And, you know what? He didn’t let me down.
He tells me they were together as kids, split, he married someone who died, he got engaged to someone else who died, and now they’re engaged.
I look at her for a second then to him then to my girlfriend. My girlfriend, bless her heart, is the only one who’s view is askew.
I look at the girl, lean in, she follows, expecting some words of goodwill, and I say,
“Can I take out life insurance on you?”