Lighten Up, Francis.

That brilliant quote, from the good half of the movie Stripes, was brought to mind today while waiting to come to work.

I’m leaning on the bus post like I always do thinking back on this horrific fucking week. Trust me when I say, if something could go wrong every day this week at least one of them was ready and willing.

Trust me when I say, every fucking day some new hell reared it’s ugly head. I’m not even saying something like the truck broke down and it turns out this is wrong with it and this and this and, oh yeah, that.

To me, that’s a single event.

Nah, this week shit was coming out of left, right, and left center field. I sat in dread of the phone; the door; a creak in the floor.

Seriously, the Zevon song, ‘Something Bad Happened To A Clown’, popped into my head more than once this week.

I’m waiting for the bus on a dark and stormy day (natch), feeling pretty bad for myself while trying to figure out ways to align the ship (‘How many lungs do I need?’ ‘If I only use ten percent of my brain, does that mean I can auction off the other ninety?’) when I feel a very large item, wet, hit me in the ear and shoulder.

‘That seems heavy and pretty singular for rain,’ I think. I look to my left shoulder and, wouldn’t you know it, bird shit.

“Lighten up, Francis.” Sargent Hulka barked in my ear.

‘Cause, no matter what, no matter how bleak, there’s always someone else willing to shit on ya.

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4 responses to “Lighten Up, Francis.

  1. francis knows exactly what you mean ! And, franny knew what it was… “heavy and pretty singular for rain” …even before you let us in on it. Yikes !

    But at least Nietzsche knew the score !

    Plod on, oh mortal, infinity is still young !

    f.

  2. Well. Gather up your nets and follow me. I have had war declared on me by Habs, fat hairy guys and now, people who live in bubbles. I got rid of the paint huffers with a case of Krylon.

  3. That has got to be the only time that a shaved head is a good thing–ease of clean-up!

    One time on vacation in Bar Harbor a sea gull crapped on my head, and I have long, almost to my waist long hair and I MADE my husband check into a hotel immediately so I could shampoo, rinse, repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat!

  4. You don’t know how right you are, Beck. This is the second time I’ve been shit on at that stop. The other time was a dead center head shot. So I just scraped it off with some cardboard from the street and all was good.

    I was coaching a girls tennis team and we’re sitting on a bench before the match. A bird shit on one of the players and she went ape shit. Some of us were laughing (okay, me) but her teammates were very understanding as she tore off her sweats and ran across the street to shower. It’s a good thing it was a home match.

    You know what that event taught me? While it’s happening to them, no one wants to hear it’s a sign of good luck. Yeah, turns out that’s not very comforting at all.

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