Good Answer

A guy begins to relate a story to me,

“I wish you were there, you would have died.”

I looked him right in the eyes and said,

“Then I’m glad I wasn’t.”

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3 responses to “Good Answer

  1. Died laughing? Died of embarassment? Died of mortification? Died with a smile on your face? Died shitting your pants? — Actually nearly everyone does this one, so it’s not that novel.

    There are so many good ways to go. Which one shall I choose?

  2. I know it’s not a complete list, but, a Boston based band, The Fools, has compiled some of them in the song, Too Many Ways To Die:

    You can get hit by a truck. A safe could fall on your head. You could be running amuck and have a heart attack in bed. A tumor could grow in your brain. You could get shot in a mall. Or how about if some big crane whacks you upside the head with a wrecking ball. The breaks could go on your car. Or maybe on the car of another. You could fall off the roof of your house (what were you doing up there anyhow?). Get shot by a jealous lover. A growth could grow in your chest. You could puncture a vital organ. You could slide down a hill in jest and a tree could crush your toboggan. You could die from contagious disease. Or a runaway lawn mower blade (there’s something that don’t happen every day). And what about them killer bees? And I don’t even want to start to talk about AIDS. There’s gangrene and jaundice and cancer and things that’ll give you the creeps, and if death is always the answer can we please just die in our sleep?

  3. I like it!

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